Hot Guy Advice

Q: Any ideas on how to get a hot guy to notice I’m alive?


Dear _______,

Throw your shoe at the back of his head. I guarantee he won’t miss you.

-Apathetic


Dear Hater of All Names and Titles,

Well, since hot guys are most likely to notice hot girls, you could try setting fire to yourself and see if that helps. Or you could spray him with a fire extinguisher.

-Fiddlesticks the Defenestrator


Dear Anonymous,

A lot of guys like girls who can sing really well. If you can’t, you could bake him cookies, or ask him out on a date so he knows you’re interested.

-Marty


Dear Blank,

Look him straight in the eye and say “Let’s hold hands.”

-Liar